Rock Macabre (Part 1/3)


Eat the dead You shitass of all the douchebags you’re the last. May you choke, you bastard, and don’t forget to go to hell ! – Well, Dyptique started with Alban and I, Zoe we do punk/rock/folk/manouche but not only that, we also do Punk/rock/funk/pop/soul/jazz/manouche …indie! – We hope we’ll find a label because we’re ready, we have a lot of songs with Tony, our drummer (Come on dude, i’m like so ready) But, we’re not exactly what they are looking for especially because of what Zoe wants to say – What I wanna say is : don’t mess with us, we are who we are, take it or leave it – Hey, this shit rhymes! “That’s how it is, don’t mess with us, take it or leave it” Ten years later – So Dyptique means two in latin… well… I think so two like Diane and Alban – and Tony, our drummer, he has been with us from the begining, and Lawrence our new bassist who can do just about anything. We’re a band that evolves, actually at the very begining we had a different singer, but she left – she’s doing very well on her own – Really? Sure about that? “Choke on them, you bastard.. ..and don’t forget to go to hell.. – You really stole everything from Dyptique! – Say you’re sorry!
– Sorry… – Say you’re sorry, you don’t know what you’re talking about ! – Anyway, in Dyptique there’s a little bit of Diane so it’s like fate wanted me to be in this band. – Excuse me. I have to go.. sorry. Give me a break. I have to see someone inside. – It’s not open yet. – I really need to see someone, I don’t care about the show. Never heard this one. – Sir, it’s okay, she’s with us. – Seriously? You need a mask now? – Don’t piss me off, just come ! – Calm down, move back! – Rock’n Roll ! – Exactly, rock’n roll, now calm down. – Down a little, yeah, a little more.. ..Okay, it’s good, thanks – Is she Zoe? Should we worry? – About Zoe? No, she’s cool, you’ll see.. ..Hey Zoe, doing good? – Sit down Tony, we’re not finished yet – We’ll talk later! – Ok, let’s go on there, Greg! – Hello, by the way – Hello Alban, can I sign the papers and get outta here Alban? Thank you Alban. (What did he get wrong?) (I said “Macarons” not “Macaroni” what a dumbass) – Oh Great, she’s here, hi, I’m Patrice from the label. – Hi, we met a few years ago. I told you to go fuck yourself. – Oh yes ! that’s what happened… anyway, here are the paper to give up the rights on Dyptique’s music we’re really happy to settle this little incident – The little incident where you play my songs and earn money from it? – “Our” songs Zoe… – Yeah, and you ruined them with your little cunt. – And who is the cunt? – Well, the cunt is… – …Okay Zoe, I have an idea, we could do a featuring, sing the song together, what do you think? – Come on, singing with you would be awesome, come on say yes Zoe! – we need to finish the set up, go back to your places fuck ! – (Just a minute) – It’s gonna be weird, people don’t know her and she doesn’t have any make up on. – Yes i am! Not like a bitch but i am.. And i don’t want to your pity! I don’t “need” to be with you.. – Zoe you clearly missed your chance by leaving the team. Tonight, I offer you to sing your song, all together, on the stage in front of hundreds of fans.. I don’t know.. Maybe everybody could be happy for once! – That’s so classic of you Alban. You want to have the cake and eat it too… even the cooker! – Am I the “cooker”? – Yes you are the fucking cooker!
– Oh and why would I be the cooker? Well because the cooker is a freaking bitch and everybody knows that! – We talk about this later? – Nice Zoe! Now you sign and get out of here please. – No! I’m not signing AND I get out of here. – Mister! Guard, what’s going on right now? – They are unstoppable! – Yeah okay but I need to pass! – No no! They are getting completely messed up! Crazy I’m telling you! – Is… is it always like that at your gigs? – What the hell is wrong with their face? – They’re… not that much on drugs usually… aren’t they? – Guys for fuck sake ! We still didn’t finished the set up yet! Patrice do your job damnit! Get out, we’ll open later… – Oh fuck, Greg! – Patrice what do we do?! Okay guys.. Let’s go just like Patrice.
– Run! – Oh you’re still there? – If you really think Alban broke your song.. Let me suggest you some new lyrics. “Hey Zoe, you’ve been put off, hear the pro make songs take off” – Keep going! – So you’re completely retarded, right? “Hey Zoe! Little cunt, Why don’t you just go fuck yourse….” – OKAY you can mix in new ideas too… – Oh wow YOU tell me to get new ideas? OH SHIT! “Calm down.. stay cool … and.. eh…. …Just stop acting like fools.” – What the hell is going on?! – “That’s strange… but it’s true! Singing seems to end their rage..” – What do they want from us?! – “Singing version! Please… If you don’t want to be possessed…” – “I don’t want… To be clumsy… But could we get out of here?” – “I.. I agree! Let’s just flee… …Eager to die? Personally… mildly!” – “In french… please… That’s not the right time to be ridiculous” – “Oh please don’t… get picky! …Our listeners love the english version” – “Admit it! You’re jealous! ..This version is better than yours” – Quick! Get out. [ To be continued ]

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